Episode 73 – MVP – Hi, I’m Candice

‘s Up, Bees? 

The last time I introduced myself was about three years ago and it’s time for a refresh. 

A lot of what you’re about to hear is still the same. Still married. Still got three kids. Still living in Utah and coaching women on how to stop wondering if they married the wrong guy. 

Since I last introduced myself, I wrote, hosted and sunsetted a trauma-informed community for coaches (more on the sunsetting later). 

I shifted from The Defying Gravity Revolution to Defying Gravity Rising and now… to Holy Ground in Hard Love. 

I’ve loved every iteration of my marriage coaching program – but this… THIS is my favorite… because it’s no longer led by me alone. 

The Divine is here. 

Because Earthly challenges sometimes require a little bit more than mind management alone. 

So I’ve combined everything I’ve learned through 20+ years of helping relationships rekindle connection. 

I’ve taken what I learned as a former marriage and family therapist rolled it up with experiences I’ve had as a Master Certified Life Coach and combined it all with client-driven versions of The Divine to get more women exactly what they want in their marriages. 

It’s sacred work – so of COURSE The Divine should have a voice here. 

We aren’t tied to any particular version of The Divine because I know that your relationship with The Divine is the most deeply personal relationship of all. 

We make room for that to look however makes the most sense and feels the most supportive TO YOU. 

It’s so important to know – like REALLY know – what The Divine wants FROM you and what The Divine wants FOR you… because the best relationship with The Divine is one that you pour into AND ALSO receive from. 

We figure that out all day, every day in my signature group coaching mentorship: Holy Ground in Hard Love – more on the specifics of all that in a couple episodes.

For now… take a listen and get to know your host a little bit better. 

——–

‘s Up, Bees?!

It’s Candice Toone, former marriage and family therapist turned master certified life coach. 

I’m often told that my voice is soothing. Calming. My Bees have been asking for a podcast for quite a while. They say they enjoy having me in their ear and on their side as they face the challenges being married inevitably brings.

If you find my voice soothing as well, I’d love for you to keep listening.

We are doing important, marriage-changing work around here. Work that matters to me because I’m on a mission to create more stable homes.

More homes where husbands and wives collaborate together – even when it’s tough to do so.

More homes with room for everyone’s perspective – even when family members disagree.

More homes big enough to hold pain and spread love – even when that seems impossible.

How does all that happen?

Let’s go back in time to get your answer.

Now’s the time to imagine those wavy lines that indicate time travel on a TV screen.

You see them. Awesome. Thanks for playing along with me.

Have you seen “Bee Movie”? Circa 2007?

I only caught the opening scene – on a TV mounted in the ceiling while my then six-year-old got his teeth cleaned – but let me tell you, it was money.

Here’s the recap:

“According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway. Because bees don’t care what humans think is impossible.”

What might be different in your marriage if you didn’t care about what humans think is impossible?

If you knew that your husband’s mood doesn’t have to dictate your day?

If you believed your worth was non-negotiable – even when he implies otherwise?

If you understood that it’s possible to love him unconditionally while completely disagreeing with his behavior?

It’s my life’s work to help women claim the freedom that comes with those kinds of beliefs. The shift from fettered to free is actually easier than you think – because YOU are 100% in charge of making the change.

Let me be clear that you don’t HAVE to do anything. You are 100% worthy and whole and awesome as you are in this very moment – even if your marriage isn’t as happy as you’d like it to be. Even if you don’t want to do any work to change that.

I get it if you’re tired. I understand what it’s like to believe that you’re already doing all of the work and nothing is changing anyway.

I can also teach you how to do the work that matters. The work that will make the difference. The work that’ll help you find a whole lot more of the connection you’ve been craving.

I can show you how to hold yourself through grief over unmet expectations and offer you hope that what you want is still within your reach.  

I consider it a huge honor that all of the Bees in the Defying Gravity Revolution have invited me into their hearts and homes to help their healing along.

I’ve always been a healer.

I was a peer counselor in the youth group of my church.

A resident advisor all through college.

I hold a bachelors degree in Developmental Psychology and a Master’s Degree in Counseling with School Counseling emphasis.

I’ve worked in multiple alternative high schools and various residential treatment centers where kids were kicked out of regular schools or removed from their homes to go live with strangers and work on farms in the middle of nowhere Utah.

Those were some of my happiest times.

I love creating new relationships and helping old ones heal.  

While I was supporting those teens in those centers, I was also studying Marriage and Family Therapy. I took on clients in private practice and guided couples who were struggling to sort it all out.

Again, happy times. I’m so grateful to be doing such meaningful work.

When people learn that I was a therapist before I became a coach, they often ask me why I made the switch.

There are a lot of reasons, but the main one is that therapy tends to follow a disease model and I didn’t like the idea that all of my clients were sick.

Didn’t fit for me. Or for the people I worked with.

They weren’t sick. They were hurting. Confused, maybe. But not sick.

I love that coaching teaches us that – more often than not – our brains are working exactly as they are designed to and if we are hurting or unhappy it’s probably because of some programming we’ve internalized that likely served us well at one time but isn’t serving us anymore.

So… we question the programming, adjust the input and change the outcome.

Such an empowering process for the coach and client alike.  

Results are often faster too – which is so very fun.

All that said, I’ll admit I was skeptical at first.  

When my first coach told me that my husband wasn’t in charge of my feelings, I rolled my eyes and turned her podcast right off.

She didn’t know me. Or him. What could she possibly know about us?

I get it if you want to turn me off at times too.

The concepts I teach can take a bit of getting used to.

Just know that if you do decide to turn me off, I’ll be here waiting to continue the conversation whenever you decide you want to.

I know there’s nothing wrong with you or with your husband.

I believe you are both doing your best.

I also know that sometimes your best is a bit misguided or maybe outdated.

His too.

Mine as well.

Good news is, it’s a simple fix and I’m ready to help if you’ll let me.

I am a Master Certified Life Coach.

I’m also certified in Deep Dive coaching, Faith-Based coaching, Feminist coaching and I host a trauma-informed coaching community where coaches come together to heal our own trauma so we can better help our clients heal theirs.

I’m a firm believer in the importance of connecting the body to the brain. I know it’s important to use all of the information sources we are given – in concert – to gather the most complete data set to make the best decisions.

Because of that, I choose to actively partner with body-based healers who have expertise beyond my own. I invite them into the Defying Gravity Hive to help my Bees connect with themselves in the deepest way – because a deep connection to yourself guarantees your ability to choose the very best route for you. Always.

And I’m here for THAT.

All day. Every day.

The Bees in the Defying Gravity Revolution are on a mission to stop wasting energy wondering if they married the wrong guy so they can start enjoying the marriage they imagined when they said “I do.”

Because that’s what we all deserve.

Enjoyable marriages.

Connected relationships.

Stable homes.

You with me?

I’m glad.

Choose courage, Bee. And let’s fly!

—————–

Thanks for listening clear through to the end. You just heard from the version of me who founded The Defying Gravity Revolution. 

I am SO proud of her – and I’m taking her legacy to the next level. 

It’s still my jam to heal relationships and strengthen marriages. 

Biggest difference between now and back then is that I no longer do that work alone. 

I partner on purpose with my unique version of The Divine and the women in my world do too. 

We’re still Bees who don’t care what humans think is impossible.

We still Defy Gravity. 

We just do it alongside our unique versions of The Divine and draw strength from that inner connection when external connection with real humans on Earth seems shaky. 

If that’s your jam – stick around. 

If not – I love you SO much and know that you’ll find the space that’s more your style. 

Around here we’re fixing to master the art of NEVER being alone. More details to come on Black Friday – so make sure you’re paying attention. 

If you feel all alone – trust me when I say that I KNOW YOU were meant for more. 

If you decide to come with us and learn “How to NOT be alone” we’ll get you the more that you were meant for before 2025 comes to a close. 

I will announce the details here on the podcast, but the women on my email list will get it first. 

If you want early access and sneak peek details, ll you’ve gotta do is go to www.candicetoone.com/wmw for Watch Me Wednesday 

When you tell me where to send all the goodies, you’ll automatically become part of the inner circle to get first look details on all the opportunities for claiming a marriage you love to live in.

You’ll also get steady doses of REAL TALK delivered to your inbox every single Wednesday – the kind you’d have on a late night road trip with your lifelong bestie after everyone else has already fallen asleep. 

To get in all that, all you’ve gotta do is head over to www.candicetoone.com/wmw and tell me exactly where you want me to keep talking to you. 

Go opt in right now, before your husband needs you to find him something he left in plain sight. 

Choose courage, Bee – I’ll be back to talk with you soon.