Ever read Geneen Roth’s “Women, Food and God”?
It’s fascinating. Definitely worth a look.
I especially loved her concept of “living as if”.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
It’s all about living…
…as if you knew you were worthy to take up space in your home and in your marriage.
…as if you believed your opinions matter.
…as if you felt how much your husband cared about and adored you.
…as if the marriage you imagine for yourself is actually possible.⠀
…as if that marriage is already happening.
Geneen shares that “decisions made from shame and force cannot be trusted.”
Read it again: “decisions made from shame and force cannot be trusted.”
And yet… I know you make decisions from shame and force all of the time.
When love and trust are also available springboards?
I’m not judging you.
I make decisions from shame and force too sometimes.
I’m also on the lookout to stop making decisions from there.
What do you say we start making more decisions from love and trust?
I’ll go first and start small. You can come along when you’re ready.
This week’s small start is pictured above. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
I hate that scrub brush.
It’s hard to hold.
It never reaches into the corners of any pot or pan.
And it hurts my knuckles when I try.
Husband loves it.
Wouldn’t let me throw it out.
So… I forced myself to suffer.
Didn’t buy the green scrubbie with the handle that I really, really wanted.
Didn’t want to crowd the sink or the cabinet below with extraneous tools when that little monster could be “good enough”.
Except I didn’t want to be a “good enough” kind of gal.
Not about this.
I do most of the dishes, so I decided to allow myself to take up space in the kitchen.
To let my opinions and preferences out to breathe.
To get myself a visual, tactile reminder that I’m here too and I deserve to be.
So now we have two scrubbies in my kitchen.
No one died.
The world is still turning.
I lived as if I matter in my marriage.
As if I am supposed to take up space and speak my desires in the world.
And my world?
It feels a whole lot more like home to me.